LGBT meet up!

hey ladies! am going to this meet up. the speaker, Reighben (male gay) i must tell you is a engaging facilitator. all voices are welcome. he'll ignite the fire in us to be proud of who we are, that we deserve fairness and equal treatment for.

it is in this meet up (filipino free thinkers and hate crime watch used to be in one meet up) that i met an out 14 year-old girl bisexual named Juno! at 14, she's already a freshman college student. she was donned in tank and skirt with headsets strapped on her neck. pretty assertive too. and what's even more interesting and inspiring is that it was her father who told her about the group and encouraged her to attend! ain't that the coolest dad?!

we all have stories to tell. if not tell, it's enriching to listen and learn of other people's stories. specially, the colorful and eventful lgbt stories. hope to see you there! =) 

Hate Crime Watch Everyone-Is-Invited General Meet-up

Saturday, October 1 · 1:00pm - 4:00pm

Cafe Molinari (Beside Treehouse), Matalino St, Barangay Central, Diliman, Quezon City

To get to know the Philippine LGBT Hate Crime Watch, Read this Blog Page:http://thephilippinelgbthatecrimewatch.blogspot.com/2011/09/philippine-lgbt-hate-crime-watch.html
Mark your calendars LGBT Rights Heroes! We're going to meet again this October 1, 2011! This time around, bring your friends, relatives, office mates and acquaintances. Let's get to know each other. Let's share with each other our opinions on the state and well-being of LGBT Filipinos. Specifically, we'll talk about:

1. What kind of prejudice do LGBT Filipinos experience? What are its roots?
2. How, in our own mundane ways, can we fight against it?
3. Finally, let's talk about the LGBT Blog Fest: Details can be found on this page:http://thephilippinelgbthatecrimewatch.blogspot.com/2011/09/lgbt-rights-blog-fest.html
4. How, in our own regular Joe/Jane/Joe-Jane capabilities, do we inspire more people to join our advocacy?
5. Are you happy with QC as a meet-up area? If not, where do you want to meet-up in?
6. Who can be with us on Oct 4 2011, 8am, at the Quezon City RTC to support Ricky Rivero for his on-going case against Hanz Ivan Ruiz?
7. We're going to have a mini writing workshop care of Oscar Atadero! :) He's going to teach us how to write press statements. :) *We may change venues so we can accommodate this activity! We'll keep you posted!*

Please invite people to come folks! Don't be shy!


too much g2g kissing prohibited :o

Leisha Hailey Kicked Off Southwest Flight, Airline Responds

source here

-- A lesbian actress who starred in the Showtime cable show "The L Word" says she was escorted off a Southwest Airlines flight for kissing a woman, while the airline says it was excessive and drew customer complaints.

Leisha Hailey took to Twitter on Monday to call for a boycott of the carrier after a flight attendant told them other passengers had complained after witnessing the affection.

Her first tweet said: "I have been discriminated against." She later added, "Since when is showing affection to someone you love illegal?"

Southwest Airlines Co. responded on its website with a four-sentence response.

"Initial reports indicate that we received several passenger complaints characterizing the behavior as excessive. Our crew, responsible for the comfort of all Customers on board, approached the passengers based solely on behavior and not gender," it said.

A discussion followed on the flight, and the airline said it "escalated to a level that was better resolved on the ground."

The actress and her unidentified girlfriend were on a flight from Baltimore to St. Louis. The kissing occurred in the air and a discussion followed when the plane landed, but details of how the couple was escorted off the flight were not included in the Southwest statement.

Hailey said the encounter between the couple and a flight attendant was recorded. It's not immediately clear who made it.

A message seeking comment from Halley's spokeswoman, Libby Coffey, was not immediately returned.

Hailey was a musician before joining the cast of the Showtime drama featuring the lives of lesbian friends and lovers living in Los Angeles. She played the character Alice Pieszecki. The show is currently not aired.

Southwest's website says it is the official airline of the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation.

Herndon Graddick, senior director of programs at GLAAD, said in an email that "GLAAD contacted Southwest to call for additional actions beyond tonight's statement that ensure all customers feel comfortable and welcomed while traveling."

Earlier this month, the Dallas-based airline kicked off Green Day's lead man Billie Joe Armstrong for wearing his pants too low. The Grammy winner was escorted off a plane after failing to follow a flight attendant's directive to pull the pants up.

Southwest also removed director Kevin Smith from a flight last year because he didn't fit properly in a single seat. His first tweet read, "Dear (at)SouthwestAir I know I'm fat, but was (the) captain (...) really justified in throwing me off a flight for which I was already seated?"

Hailey is preparing to launch a 21-city tour to promote breast cancer awareness.


another commentary on the issue :
Southwest's Big Gay Blunder

of rainbows in puppy love

you know why i continue to have hope in this country? reading articles like this, printed in the most popular broadsheet in the country, which equally discusses issues on both hetero and homosexual perspective makes me believe that the hoping is not in vain. as tcf commented in one of my posts, "we can do this!" oh yes we can! =)

Puppy love

Pinoy Kasi, By: Michael L. Tan
Philippine Daily Inquirer
Tuesday, September 27th, 2011
source here

The problem is that people think the RH bill is meant only for family planning, which they then associate with old-style population education schools with reproductive anatomy, condoms and pills and which anti-RH groups say will be taught in grade school. What the RH bill proposes is sexuality education, taught early, yes, but in an age-appropriate way to deal with human development, relationships, gender roles and responsibilities.

The opposition to early sexuality education also comes from the misconception that before puberty children have no sexuality. Yet the biological facts are clear: the body begins to change as early as the age of 6 or 7, being primed in very subtle but significant ways for approaching puberty. By the time menstruation arrives (or, for males, the first wet dream), the body has already been producing hormones for some time to bring about puberty.

Even more importantly, children at a very early age, again about the age of 6 or 7, are already feeling “attraction,” developing what we call “puppy love.” This can be a classmate, a schoolmate, a teacher, an actor or an actress. I had a secretary whose 7-year-old daughter would squeal in delight (gigil na gigil) watching the rock group F4 with their boyish band players.

Sexual orientation is manifested this early, so a boy may feel attracted to a girl, or to another boy. And don’t think it’s only the effeminate boy who feels same-sex attraction. It can be your totally macho rough-and-tumble boy beginning to feel for other boys, or your Barbie-doll lipstick-loving daughter feeling for another girl.

Much of puppy love will be innocent and inconsequential, but there can also be cases when young children are put at risk. We saw this in the recent tragedy in an SM mall in Pampanga, where a 13-year-old boy shot a 16-year old, also male, and then himself. Both died.

I appreciate how mass media didn’t go into a sensational frenzy over this incident, the names of the boys kept confidential, and the coverage being fairly muted. But I suspect the low-key coverage was due in part to the reporters not being able to figure out what was going on, primarily whether there was a gay relationship or not.

The two boys went to their graves with the answers. We will never really know since the families are understandably reluctant to talk about the tragedy.

Clearly, this was a case of a very close same-sex relationship. Was it a homosexual relationship? This is more difficult to answer. Adolescents often go into very intense and intimate same-sex relationships that are not necessarily homosexual. Conversely, there can be homosexual relationships but without sex involved. Which just shows how complicated adolescent sexuality can be.


We have to recognize the challenges children face dealing with gender and sexuality. The physical as well as intense emotional changes begin long before puberty. We cannot leave them to figure out those feelings on their own, or leave them to fend for themselves. Those with “heterosexual” feelings already have it tough, for example, a young boy wondering why he is beginning to like the girl next door whom he used to “hate.” The same applies for a young girl who used to “hate” boys but pines away for that guy living around the corner.

Now imagine the anxieties and troubled feelings when it’s a young boy realizing he has a crush on another male. The film “Ang Pagdadalaga ni Maximo Oliveros” captured the poignancy around a baklita (young bakla who cross dresses) feeling puppy love for the neighborhood policeman.

The baklita is actually more fortunate, accepted in the community (often an urban poor area) partly as a jester and partly because people think it’s all innocent fun. Shift to a boy or girl growing up in a middle—or upper—class family, with all its anti-gay prejudice (more because of “what will our neighbors say?”) and stigmatization of homosexuality, and the problems become more complicated.

It’s not surprising that so many young Filipinos—gay or straight—go into secret relationships, fearful that their parents will ground them. And the opportunities for meeting people have now multiplied, through malls, as well as the Internet. The two boys who died in Pampanga were said to have met through Facebook.

I have seen some local anti-RH websites claiming that RH advocates pedophilia, simply because sexuality education will, certainly, discuss those issues. But I will counter the arguments and say that a withholding of sexuality education for our youth will in fact make them more vulnerable to exploitation by adults, whether heterosexual or homosexual.

Young people need to understand what’s going on in their bodies, and minds and hearts. They need, as well, to learn, long before puberty, to understand their bodies, to respect people and to respect themselves, and how they can protect themselves from deception and manipulation, or, more simply, how they will deal with heartbreaks and disappointments. For the boys especially, they have to learn that love and sexuality are not about conquests and possession but about mutual responsibilities.

I might have over-emphasized the trials and tribulations around young love. With the right environment in homes and schools, with supportive parents and teachers, young people will have many happy memories of puppy love and first love.

Irish gay senator gets OK for presidential race

Yey! Gay! :) We actually have several gay politicians. Now only if they'll come out. But I don't have moral ascendancy over them being not out myself. Still, wouldn't it be grand if we can freely and proudly run under the rainbow banner?

Irish gay senator gets OK for presidential race

Agence France-Presse
Posted at 09/28/2011 9:37 AM
source here

DUBLIN - Gay Irish senator David Norris succeeded Tuesday in securing the backing of the four local councils he needs to get his name on the ballot paper in the October 27 presidential election.

The long-time champion of gay rights is now expected to be one of a record seven candidates, including former IRA commander Martin McGuinness, who will be chasing the largely ceremonial head-of-state job when nominations close on Wednesday.

Another independent candidate, former MEP and 1970 Eurovision song contest winner Dana Rosemary Scallon, said she was "just thrilled" after she also secured the necessary backing of councils on Tuesday.

Scallon was an unsuccessful candidate in the 1997 presidential election when President Mary McAleese was elected for her first seven-year term.

Under Ireland's constitution, those seeking to succeed McAleese need either the backing of 20 parliamentarians or four councils to get on the ballot paper.

Joycean scholar Norris had abandoned his bid to become the country's first gay president last month after controversy about a statutory rape case involving a former lover.

It emerged that he wrote to the Israeli authorities pleading for clemency for his former partner Ezra Yitzhak, who was accused of the statutory rape of a 15-year-old Palestinian boy in 1992.

Yitzhak pleaded guilty to the charge and was convicted in 1997.

Norris re-launched his campaign earlier this month saying people love a comeback and his "would be the biggest comeback in Irish political history".

After he secured his fourth council nomination Norris tweeted, "Many many thanks to the Councillors of Dublin City Council! I have secured the last nomination needed! I am looking forward to the campaign!"

A poll in last weekend's Sunday Business Post found Norris was the front-runner with 21 percent support in what is the most crowded race ever for the presidency.

The newspaper warned, however that he might struggle to get transfer votes under Ireland's proportional representation voting system and it described the race as "completely wide open".

Second in the poll was former Labour party minister Michael D. Higgins with 18 percent, and third was Sinn Fein's McGuinness, who has stepped aside as Northern Ireland's deputy first minister, on 16 percent.

Behind them was MEP Gay Mitchell of Prime Minister Enda Kenny's Fine Gael party and independent and former Special Olympics chairwoman Mary Davis, each with 13 percent.

Independent Sean Gallagher, a businessman, was on 11 percent and Scallon was on six percent.

Over 3.1 million will be eligible to vote on October 27 when there will also be two ballots to amend Ireland's constitution and a by-election in the Dublin West constituency to fill a seat left vacant by the death of former finance minister Brian Lenihan



i don't really consider myself a feminist or an activist of some sort. but i do take interest in the lgbt affairs. there was an uproar from the lgbt community about an ABS-CBN morning show anchor blaming our people for the death of two teenagers. when the news came out, i was in such a happy plane that i didn't have the expletives to express then. but am glad that we have staunch defenders in the community that mightily represented us and properly corrected all the wrong in anthony taberna's unfounded and ridiculous theory. you can read our people's say on this in these 3 posts:

On Flaunting
Op-Ed: An Open Letter to Anthony Taberna

Short Reactions to Mr. Taberna's Homophobia 

Watch the video here

he made mention that we are good in the performance arts. i made a quick check of the women i've come to personally know through this blog, and to my surprise, none belongs to the "performance arts"! hehe.

let me see, we have doctors, lawyer, writers (print, tv, online), banker, architect, manager, graphic artist, nurse, IT professionals, students, researchers, PhD grads, financial analyst. impressive demographic yeah? :) but performance artist? nada. 

if being "maarte" is counted, then we have one performance maartist in me. haha. well, i do know we are performers. we excel in our fields. if not really super excel, at least we have fabulous outfits to dress the part. tee-hee!

i had a dream and it is round

There's something about being a minority that makes me want all lgbt peeps to succeed in their/our respective fields.  I want us to be in a position of power and influence, not to demean anyone, but so that others won't/can't easily discriminate us. 

An Anonymous reader sent this comment about the Crime and Prejudice post.

... if there's anything that struck me then as profoundly true, it's that tolerance is a far cry from acceptance. The Philippines may be progressing in that aspect, but at what rate? :/ There's still a long way before the majority would ever be purged clean of the cringing and name-calling and prejudice.

Only when you're privileged enough to revolve in a circle of open-minded people do you have semblance of a freedom.

i haven't experienced this so-called acceptance yet, but the way Anonymous painted it makes me want to stretch my arms, catch a falling star, and kiss a dream. i have been so used with wearing my closet shoes and its matching closet dress because it safely but cautiously allowed me to navigate my way, to secretly co-exist in the straight world. it sure does feel like a lifetime ago when i fit like a T in the straight world. until i discovered that the world is not straight, but round! as round as the curve of a woman's hips that bore the generation before us. as round and firm as a woman's buttocks extending to round and strong limbs. twice as round as a woman's pair of nurturing breasts. as round as a woman's face that is second to nature to cup. as round as a woman's personality that rolls with the times and necessity. 

the world is round and there's no turning back. 


mabuhay ka!

I have a problem. I want to save the world. And I can't. I want to help people, but just don’t have the means to do so.  As my good friend succinctly put it, "Unfortunately, your bank account is not as huge as your heart (for now)." am particularly affected by two people because these are very good/nice people.

Among all the people I gave money to/helped, they are one of the most deserving of support and second chance. One is a woman who was a childhood friend from a church group I belonged to then. I learned that she didn’t graduate college for lack of funds, got married early to a good-for-nothing guy, has 3 kids now, separated with the guy, re-united with a childhood sweetheart. after 2 yrs, the guy turned out to be married also! And had fed her with lies. So she's back to her parents' house, trying to make ends meet. I just saw her in the neighborhood while I was aimlessly walking at the market. I didn't recognize her. She just called my name and was surprised that it was her. Life had not been that kind to her. She proudly shared though that her eldest who studies in a public school (where I also studied in elementary, she went to a private school) was a chess champ. :) as I was walking home, I got this resolve to support her son's studies. Err, once I've raised the funds. I texted her that I want to talk to her about something, but didn’t get a reply.

I got a text though from my sister's ex-bf who had an accident years ago and has become paralyzed because of it. He greeted me good afternoon and I asked how he was. In so many words after several sms exchanges, he shyly asked for help because he and his brother and mom moved out to leave their abusive dad. They are currently living with an aunt and needs money for an apartment to rent. His ofw brother's remittance was delayed. He is a very good, responsible guy. Breadwinner in the family, cheerful. I treat him as family. The accident happened when his co-workers asked him to join an overnight swim in cavite. In the height of their fun, he thought of using the slide head first. his head hit the pool floor and was unconscious. They transported him to manila and we all rushed to the hospital. He's a very hardworking guy who started working young. I don’t blame him for trying to be a kid and have fun on that unfortunate moment.

Due to lack of money, he wasn’t able to continue with his therapy, thus he still can't walk nor sit up without aid. He remains cheerful though and full of fighting spirit. I told him, that I don’t have the funds, but will definitely save up for it. And just showered him with encouragement. He said that I should not worry, because he has no plan of giving up. My heart swelled with pride for this guy. And told him just that. He was very surprised and didn’t even believe me. He said, "wala naman akong nagawa." it was then my turn for disbelief. I honestly told him why I am proud of him. "Kasi responsible ka. Nagsikap, nagtrabaho ka para sa pamilya mo. mabait,  masayahin, magaan kasama at kausap. Matapang at matatag kahit madaming problema. Hindi ba kaproud-proud ang mga katangian na yan? Nakakabilib kang tao."

I continue to question why bad things happen to good people, specially those who didn’t have had a chance to comfortable life yet.  I often hear of good karma, but while I believe in it, it sure does take its sweet time in fulfilling its work. Thus my heart grieves.

I've recently heard from the news a woman killing her husband, a teen-age boy killing another boy and then himself. While others struggle to survive, some can just easily end lives. I wonder why in all the hardships I experienced I never once thought of killing myself. Sure, I did hurt myself at times, but not with an intent for death. Then I realized it's because I want to live to see the day that things will be fair and right, if not for me, at least for the people I care for. I want to meet good karma, introduce and share her to my friends, live with her and be with her till we're old and gray.

Masarap mabuhay hindi lang para sa sarili, kundi mas lalo para sa iba.


Train Crush 21

in this harsh and fierce world we live in, it is comforting to see someone simple and unassuming. a young woman who may be oblivious to the power she holds within. that mindless lip biting gesture can send many hearts a-flutter and several throats gulping (i belong to the second group. hehe).

somehow i know that even without that lip biting habit of yours,  your skin, your lips will still be as supple and fresh as the flesh inside a seedless, ripe  lanzones. sweet. juicy. d.e.l.i.c.i.o.u.s. one that i would approach with restraint so i can savor the experience with each extended second. and so that with every pore in my body it can record to lasting memory how innocence really tastes like.

kwentuhang adik

FRIEND 1: how are u?
FRIEND 2: ang puso ay naguguluhan ng slight. merong girl ako na gusto ng slight. kaso ang gusto nya ay mega commitment tapos asa ibayong dagat pa sya. so dinecline ko na. i learned na nage-entertain na ng iba ang potah. parang may sundot/kurot ng slight. otherwise am ok
FRIEND 1: Wehehehe. Wow! she moved on quickly
FRIEND 2: e sinunod lang nmn daw nya payo ko. Na magsocialize.
FRIEND 1: aba! masunurin
FRIEND 2: syet!
FRIEND 1: baka gustong gusto nya na tlaga magcommit
FRIEND 2: ndi pa ko ready e. gusto ko landian muna. hehe
FRIEND 1: tama. masaya eh.
FRIEND 2: enjoy ako. hawak ko oras ko
FRIEND 1: ohh the freedom
FRIEND 2: true! pag super gusto ka. mejo nakakairita. pag lumayo nmn, apektado ka. sana tamang cool lang. paparamdam pero ndi sobra sobra
FRIEND 1: ehehe. Ba’t apektado? nanghinayang ka lang sa attention. withdrawal symptom ba
FRIEND 2: ego din.: ginive up ka agad
FRIEND 1: ehehe. yun na yun! Lol! we are vain creatures
FRIEND 2: i know
FRIEND 1: vain and proud
FRIEND 2: and i dont care
FRIEND 1: yes
FRIEND 2: true!!!!
FRIEND 1: no apologies

FRIEND 1: ex keeps on liking my posts ng photos in fb. papanchin
FRIEND 2: ah. pampam
FRIEND 1: i hid her FB feeds so kyebs ako sa kanya
FRIEND 2: tamah!
FRIEND 1: i dont want to. pag lumapit lapit na naman yan, hihiritan ko cya. wag ka na nga! di mo naman ako kayang mahalin.
FRIEND 2: sunget!
FRIEND 1: wag ka lapit ng lapit. baka mainlab ka na naman
FRIEND 2: cocky. she's been warned
FRIEND 1: hay. we're so born in the wrong country
FRIEND 2: ahaha naiisip ko yan minsan

FRIEND 2: parang ang sarap mainlab uli. kakamiss
FRIEND 1: ahahah. inlab with the thought of being in love. i just miss having sex
FRIEND 2: lalo pag nakakarinig ako ng mga love songs
FRIEND 1: well yes
FRIEND 2: parang kahit sino kaya mong ikiss. hahaha
FRIEND 1: sex. booty call
FRIEND 2: no kiss for me
FRIEND 1: sex
FRIEND 2: gusto ko kiss. kasi andun ang romance. ang dinedenote ng kiss
FRIEND 1: such a girl. Lol. kiss is so intimate
FRIEND 2: i can only do it with someone na am in love with
FRIEND 1: kiss buys me a dream
FRIEND 2: so now, sex lang.
FRIEND 1: sex buys me a really deep sleep
FRIEND 2: i can do that on my own
FRIEND 1: it's not that... intense. i love all the rocking and the bending. switching places and stuff
FRIEND 2: yoga can give u that siguro
FRIEND 1: yeah i will try yoga sometime this year. I’ve been celibate for months now.
FRIEND 2: parang ang sarap mabaliw uli. do crazy stuff
FRIEND 1: hmmm. like?
FRIEND 2: crazy love stuff
FRIEND 1: it’s nice to lose one's balance
FRIEND 2: yeah
FRIEND 1: i just want crazy. no love involved muna
FRIEND 2: hayyy
FRIEND 1: bored?
FRIEND 2: pensive. am now sure. am in love with love
FRIEND 1: yes.


i, thank you!

okay fine. aaminin ko, hindi pa ko nakakamove-on sa pagkapanalo ni Supsup ng 3rd runner-up sa miss universe. :D

Dahil siguro sabik tayong manalo, kaya hanggat hindi tayo nakaka-miss universe title uli, laging dinaya tayo! Hehe. Bukod sa laban ni manny pacquiao, apektado din ang buong bansa sa pwesto lagi ng philippines sa miss universe. Siguro kasi isa itong paksa na sakop ang pandama at pang-unawa ng lahat. Mula taong grasa, masa, kolehiyala, nago-opisina, nanghuhuli ng buwaya, nagmimisa, hanggang ofws sa ibang bansa. At dahil ang kagandahan ay base sa panlasa ng tumitingin, walang tama o mali, kaya mas masarap magdebate. Hehe.

Bakit tayo dinaya?
1. Ms Philippines lang ang hindi gumamit ng interpeter. Yung apat, mas mahaba ang oras sa pag-iisip dahil sigurado, nakakaintindi naman sila ng Ingles pero nagpa-interpreter pa rin. Kaya ang totoo, dalawang beses sinabi ang tanong sa kanila.

2. Lagi na lang pinakamahirap ang tanong sa Ms Philippines. Ngayon, mahirap na kontrobersyal pa kasi may usaping relihiyon. Ganunpaman, pinakabongga ang sagot nya! Yung iba ang sisimple at safe.

3. Madaming lalaki sa judges na tinamaan sa sagot ni Supsup na personal na ayaw magpaconvert. mga buseet!

4. Ang daming hakot sa audience ng Angola kaya sya nanalo. Ang Pilipinas kasi patuloy na naghihirap pa kaya walang pondo ang mga pinoy para dumayo sa Brazil at sumuporta.

Pano tayo mananalo sa susunod na miss universe?
1. Sa susunod na taon, summa cum laude na ng UP ang ipapadala natin.
**i learned na may summa cum na tayong sinali, si anna theresa licaros**

2. Aralin ang lokal na salita kung saan gaganapin ang miss universe. Para pag sagot, may English version at local version para matuwa ang audience. Wagi at wagas!

3. Pag-iipunan na ng mga supporters ang pamasahe papunta kung saan man gaganapin ang patimpalak. O kaya maki-tie up sa Cebu Pacific para magkaroon ng piso fare sale sa bansang pag-dadausan ng miss universe. sugood! mga kapatid! :D

Side comment:
Si Lea Salonga, sana hinirapan nya ang tanong kay Ms Angola, para naman fair. tanong na gaya nito:

Miss Angola, in 100 words or less, how would you solve the ongoing problems between Israel and Palestine? Cite sources.

^^napulot ko sa peyups.com ang tanong na yan. hehe

Super Supsup! :)

i had a ballistic/depression episode last night because of family issues. coming to work looking and feeling like crap, i thought am meant to suffer the whole day, puffy eyes and all. but when i learned that our very dear Supsup placed 3rd runner-up in miss universe, the big, bad, dark cloud hoverring my head instantly disappeared. suddenly masaya na ko. =) so much that i decided to celebrate. bought strawberry milk shake and ate cake. shakey's was in its usual make-you-wait-forever kind of service and the skin cancerous noontime sun was piercingly ouchie. but you know what? i don't fucking care! *gives the finger. wala lang, parang astig lang kasi. hehe* i am soo happy that am not affected. and have committed to celebrating and feeling good today. hehe. thank you Supsup! *tsup! tsup!*

Judge Vivica A. Fox asked Supsup, "Would you change your religious beliefs to marry the person you love? Why or why not?"

Supsup answered: "If I would have to change my religious beliefs, I would not marry the person that I love. Because the first person that I love is God, who created me. I have my faith and my principles, and this is what makes me who I am. If the person loves me, he'll love my God too."

i love the way the question and the answer were lgbt-sensitive worded. the use of "person" instead of "man". i mean, how politically correct of miss universe organization to do so. =) times are changing and it's making me tingly. err, Supsup did say "he" at the end, but hey, let's give her some slack. *i forgive you Supsup* baby steps. baby steps. =)

She graduated magna cum laude from the University of the Philippines-Diliman campus with a degree in Architecture. AND also topped the Architecture Licensure Examination in July 2010 in the Philippines.

if that didn't impress you still, am sure her mouth-watering pose will. ;)


drinking in you

i've met many women in coffee shops. starbucks is the official eb venue ng bayan. then when it got too crowded with the surge of ebs (that didn't look right, hahaha. of course i meant eb in plural), we shifted to seattle's best which seems to be often just front or side of starbucks. since my fave drink is hot choco classic with just 2 dips of mocha, i still buy my drink at starbucks and settle with my friends at seattle's. hehe. i do love seattle's macaroons. a guilty pleasure for me. but i still go for old fashion oatmeal cookie at starbucks. and my super favorite cake, the perfect raspberry cheesecake at coffee bean & tea leaf. a recent discovery.

for someone who is not a heavy drinker (yeah , gone are the days. hehe), i embraced the advent of coffee shops as an alternative hang out place. i used to wonder why it is perceived that gimmicks are more fun if mixed with alcohol. to prove a point, me and my college buddies replaced our drink with soda and did our discussions. i admit, it wasn't the same. like the conversations weren't as interesting?

but after all the alcohol drinking i did to the dismay of my liver, where in drunken stupor i cried, laughed, kissed, touched, had sex, made a fool of myself, got harassed too, proposed with, vomited my gut out, i realized that twas the intoxication that largely had me doing those things. was i sincere then, like was it my true self unmasked? if i can still remember, maybe. hehe. but there is something surreal on those moments. twas hell fun, true. but now that i've seem to have matched my alcohol drinking craze with the coffee shop drinking, i realized that many of my heart-to-heart conversations happened while mildly caffeinated.

talks not limited to the appearance of moon and stars, which can be as intense as the noon glare. lips that get burned with the heat from the words in as much as the coffee temperature i was served with. a woman steadily looking at me, after taking a sip from her herbal tea while she reaches for my hand on the table and i smile back, intertwining my fingers with hers. i feel warm and fuzzy and my heart is full.

we share stories, however mundane, disagree on issues we have opposing views of. we laugh with nostalgic joy of the silly things we did for love and even of just simple embarrassments. our tears helplessly fall from bad news and why sometimes beyond our control, things just don't work out as we imagined it would. memories are clear, feelings are real, moments are honest. the kind that doesn't get forgotten after a hangover or easily evaporate like the aroma of the coffee brew.

 Landon Pigg

i think that possibly, maybe im falling for you
yes theres a chance that ive fallen quite hard over you.
ive seen the paths that your eyes wander down
i want to come to

i think that possibly, maybe im falling for you

no one understands me quite like you do
through all of the shadowy corners of me

i never knew just what it was about this old coffee shop
i love so much
all of the while i never knew
i never knew just what it was about this old coffee shop
i love so much
all of the while i never knew

i think that possibly, maybe im falling for you
yes theres a chance that ive fallen quite hard over you.
ive seen the waters that make your eyes shine
now i'm shining too

because oh because
ive fallen quite hard over you

if i didnt know you, id rather not know
if i couldnt have you, i'd rather be alone

i never knew just what it was about this old coffee shop
i love so much
all of the while i never knew
i never knew just what it was about this old coffee shop
i love so much
all of the while, i never knew

all of the while , all of the while it was you.

**thanks Hapi for the song =)

Cine Europa 14

pano ba hatiin ang katawan without being a manananggal? it seems i only have this weekend and there's the book fair and now the Cine Europa! *panic mode!* sorry Kim, looks like we can't do your swim lesson this Sat. maybe when the frenzy's over. :)

details in Click the City

Book Fair! Yey!

what has been happening lately? my favorite events lining up side by side. indie film screenings, stage plays, poetry readings, art fair, film fests and now book fair. it's like the universe has conspired to ensure i spend a lot of money and not regret it. hehe. thank you my fairy god universe for saving from the lure of malls (not that am a big fan) and senseless window shopping and still not buying anything. hehe. the last book i bought was 9/2, the Under the Storm, a compilation of 150 wonderful poems. i hope to find good stuff. and just the feel of being surrounded with loads of books! to touch and smell the pages and get transported to the stories, fact or fiction. i love it. it is my standing dream to have my own library someday. someday becomes sooner with each book fair to horde books from. hay...universe, i love you!  =)  

Exhibit Halls 1 – 4, SMX Convention Center, Mall of Asia Complex, Pasay City, Metro Manila

September 14 - 18, 2011

10:00 A.M. – 8:00 P.M.

ORGANIZERPrimetrade Asia, Incorporated
5th Floor Accelerando Building,395 Sen. Gil Puyat Avenue, Bry. Bel-Air, 1209 Makati City, Metro Manila
Telephone Nos. (632) 896-0661, 896-0682 • Fax No.: (632) 896-0695
Website: http://www.primetradeasia.com/

PARTNER ORGANIZATIONSBook Development Association of the Philippines (BDAP)
Asian Catholic Communicators, Inc. (ACCI)
Philippine Booksellers Association, Inc. (PBAI)
Overseas Publishers’ Representatives Association of the Philippines (OPRAP)


crime and prejudice

do you think lgbt is already accepted in the philippines? 
do you think there's still prejudice against lgbt in the philippines?
do you think there's hate crime in the philippines?

those were the questions posted in the Filipino Free Thinkers meet up end of August which i attended to for the first time.

i think accepted is not the word, but more like tolerated, at least in manila. is tolerance a form of acceptance? maybe. the workforce now welcomes diversity and promotes equal rights. it's becoming common to see cross-dressers and some lgbt couples in public places, doing couple stuff. hehe. for the next question, prejudice. i think there is prejudice, but not to a point that will physically harm any one. there may be snide remarks or hush hush talks behind our back, sometimes, on our face, often in the form of a joke for those who are subtle. there are soo many lgbt jokes that there'd be volumes if we compile them into a book! so is being joked about prejudice? well, are there gender/sexuality-specific jokes about the heteros? thus i feel that it's a form of prejudice.

am thinking that maybe we are so hungry for acceptance that to be talked/ridiculed in the form of jokes is good enough for us. we sort of think that to be ridiculed or be the butt of joke is a form of acceptance because at least we are now being talked about and acknowledged as existing. now the jokes don't seem that funny to me anymore.

there are hate crimes as the data shown to us proves. but these were under the blanket category of crime and not specified as hate crime. and it seems to me that the prejudice and hate are directed towards the extreme types of the lgbt spectrum. like those distinctly/stereotypical lgbt - butch, drags/cross-dressers. because in the haters' mind, those are the only kind of lgbt. maybe this is reason to come out, to make it known that we do look like the straights too, only more fabulous. hehe. that we are in all industries in various positions, even the influential stature too. hello, tim cook! new ceo of apple.

i will post some more about this maybe later. i just want to prelude the event later.

i joined this sub group in Filipino Free Thinkers: THE PHILIPPINE LGBT HATE CRIME WATCH.

It is a diverse, inclusive, and non-partisan community of individuals and organizations dedicated to ending anti-LGBT prejudice and the hate crimes born from it.

There's a meet up later. sorry for the late post. 

Saturday, 10 SEPTEMBER 2011, 1PM - TODAY!
at Cafe Mo inside TREEHOUSE in Matalino Street, 
Barangay Central, Quezon City 


mons pubis

I had a dream. I was lining up for food/drink of three kinds placed on three separate tables. The offering was salt on one table, tequila on the second table and lemon on the last. When the line cleared up on the lemon table, I hurriedly went to it. Then suddenly, I felt a sensation on my mons pubis, like somebody's touching, rubbing it. I woke up. The feel of the hand that touched me still in my memory. When I opened my eyes, room still dark, I saw a guy (whom I used to call tatay) beside the bed squatting on the floor, looking at me. I quickly sat and screamed, "ano'ng ginagawa mo?!” he calmly said, "umuungol ka, binabangungot ka. tanga!", then motioned to stand up to leave. In my daze, I asked, "bakit mo ko hinahawakan dun?!” in my half-awake memory "I think" I remember him saying, "wala na kong mahawakan". Something to that effect. Stunned. My phone vibrated. "gising ka na?" my jogging buddy's sms. I replied to her and shared what just happened. I also sms'd a couple of people about it.

I woke up/awaken 4:56am, her sms came 4:58am, my phone alarm was set at 5am. The four damned minutes that will stretch to sleepless nights pillowed in fear. 

Please don’t make me dream again.

Since I just woke up, I can still remember my dream and I know I was not having a nightmare. How can lining up for tequila drink count as nightmare?! Unless they ran out of drinks. I didn’t reach that part of the dream yet. So I am sure in my conscious state that I was not "binabangungot".

And assuming I was, won't you turn on the lights? Shake the person and act with sense of urgency? Not with calm, in pitch dark and certainly not have time to reach for something below the belt.

Hindi ako tanga.

I have been violated. In my mind I rationalized, at least I was not raped. But that doesn't dismiss the fact that the act happened. I have been violated. What’s more violating is that I have to repeat the scene over and over in my head to dichotomize what's dream and what's real.

Since what happened close between my legs happened between my asleep and awake moment, the memory gets blurry the more I recount it. My first sms of it was the freshest memory of what I think actually happened. The more I try to recall, the more I am unsure. Was it a dream? But he was right there when I woke up! Was I sure? I can faintly remember him removing his hand. But can't determine with certainty if I actually saw it touching my body. But the sensation of the hand invading my body haunts me no end.

What I think happened made me doubt my worth. Like am not worthy for anyone anymore. :(

I initially wanted to tell my sisters and mom. My mom was out on vacation then. But then, since I am uncertain of the details, I don’t want to cause uproar over something unclear. Thus, I figured it best to confront him about it. Was meaning to catch him, but he's often drunk if not locking himself in their room. I talked to my mom about them and she said, the man apologized to her from their last fight and have been kind to her. My mom was obviously happy of the change. I wouldn’t want my mom's new-found happiness become short-lived over something I haven't figured out.

Seeking the opinion of some people, I thought am okay. Like we've bled the situation dry and am sick of it. But come night time, I surprisingly get conscious of my sleeping position, pillows and blanket to cover me. And without warning, my chest would tighten and my eyes would well. I think I lost weight these past weeks with all the crying I did. So much that when I saw an ex-ofcmate the other day, she exclaimed, "ang payat mo na! anong nangyari sa yo?!" fuck her! I didn’t respond. But my mind quipped, "mataba ka lang". I've always been slim so I dunno what she's horrified about. The dress I was wearing must have made me look skinnier than usual. Mental note not to wear that goddamn dress again.

One morning when I decided to sleep longer than usual (and be late at work) to make up for all the sleepless nights, I saw a glimpse of him hesitantly at the door checking if somebody's in the room. I know he usually turns off the lights in the house to save electricity. But noticing that I was still in bed, he didn’t come close anymore. For a moment there I felt a pang of pity for the man. I think he intentionally avoided me given my reaction. And he appeared smaller than before. For once, I think I saw him stoop. And I am sorry for him.

I hate it that am soft hearted. And weak.

After processing what happened for weeks and still remain unsure, I have decided to stop this suffering and just let go. Of the pain, the bad thoughts, of being a victim. I just woke up and felt this surge of intensity to reclaim my life, my right to live it the way I want it. I am ready to move on, not forgetting, but forgiving and being more careful now.  To forgive is to be free. And I am now free.

In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out.  It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being.  We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.  ~Albert Schweitzer

During these past weeks of struggle, I'd like to sincerely thank three people who've helped me find my way to sanity.

A - there are no perfect persons, only perfect timing. Thank you for being with me immediately after. The whole day adventure you dragged me into was just what I needed then. I know the madness of a life I have is something remote to you, but still you tried. I think you said it best, "Ano'ng magagawa ko?"

B - all I needed to say was, "can we talk now?" and you said, "wait, will just shower" (even though you haven't had a wink of sleep yet). Thank you for making it easy for me, for not needing to laboriously explain. For combating my emotionality with your cold case approach.

C - you are a living testament that I can surmount this.  Your encouragement and honesty helped me make sense of what was wrong in my victim/loser-mode perception.  I never thought I'd say this, but thanks for that painful slap. :)

I initially didn’t want to post this, but I feel that others may have had the same misfortune. And so, this is me telling you - you are not alone.  And I am here for you.


girl-to-girl / lesbian themed films

Hi ladies! :) Here are the girl-to-girl themed films which I am familiar with. I have placed an * to the titles I personally like. RM has been downloading these so you might want to ask for copies from her. Hehe. Thanks RM! :)

Clyte - as promised, here's the list :)

Gangrene - thanks for the additional suggestions :)

G2G / Lez-themed Flicks
*And Then Came Lola
*Better Than Chocolate
*Black Swan
*But I'm a Cheerleader -funny and touching
*Chasing Amy - love the way g2g is explained
Claire of the Moon
Desert Hearts - recommended by gangrene
Family Affair
Gia - stars angelina jolie 
*Goldfish Memory - the first i enjoyed immensely
*Gray Matters - recommended by gangrene. seen this. love it! :)
High Art - recommended by gangrene. haven't seen this yet.
*I Can't Think Straight - cute multi-racial couple!
*If These Walls Could Talk 2 - i heart chloe sevigny as butch
*Imagine Me and You - lovely couple :)
*The Incredible Adventures of Two Girls In Love
Itty Bitty Titty Committee
It's In the Water
Kids Are All Right
*Kissing Jessica Stein - the first i've seen
Lost and Delirious
*Loving Annabelle - annabelle is intense! :)
Memento Mori
Mulholland Drive
My Summer of Love
Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit
*Puccini For Beginners - shows how fluid we can be 
*Rome and Juliet - the first local g2g film that i really liked. fan of andrea del rosario!
Room in Rome
*Saving Face - love this!
*Show Me Love - cute!
Spider Lilies
*The Runaways - kristen stewart and dafota fanning. need i say more? ;)
*The Truth About Jane - cried a river over this bec of the coming out dilemma
*Tipping the Velvet (Brit version) - my top g2g film :)

If you ladies know some more good stuff, feel free to suggest some more. thanks! =)

you can also check these sites for more: wolfe video and imdb



pagbigyan nyo na ko. cheesy mode. hehe.


Kay tagal kong sinusuyod ang buong mundo
Para hanapin, para hanapin ka
Nilibot ang distrito ng iyong lumbay
Pupulutin, pupulutin ka

Sinusundo kita,
Asahan mong mula ngayon pag-ibig ko’y sayo
Asahan mong mula ngayon pag-ibig ko’y sayo

Sa akin mo isabit ang iyong lumbay
Di kukulangin ang ibibigay
Isuko ang kaba tuluyan kang bumitaw
Ika’y manalig
Manalig ka..
Sinusundo kita

Asahan mong mula ngayon pag-ibig ko’y sayo
Asahan mong mula ngayon pag-ibig ko’y sayo

Handa na sa liwanag mo
Sinuyod ang buong mundo
Maghihintay sayo’ng sundo


Saturday night parrrty!

Okay, here's the plan, Under the Storm book launch at Ayala Museum on Friday, Handmade Art Fair at Manila on Saturday afternoon and then party at night on Makati. Saya :)

JUPITER ST. in bet.


Dress Code - Dress to Impress -*Neat and Trendy Appearence a Must!.

4 PARTY DETAILS TEXT: 639155743155       |639234103893      +639064302822     

Sabado af-Fair :)

ektayted na ko dito! :) inaabangan ko 'to. hehe. dito ako magshashopping. hehe. punta rin kayo! :)

the poster doesn't do justice to what they can offer. so here's a peak of how it's like. check this link where it captured last month's af-fair. fb page here.

i will particularly buy from Alunsina handbound books which will sell there =)

free gimmick on Friday

.MOV International Film, Music, & Literature Festival, in cooperation with The Antithesis Collective, presents the book launch of Under the Storm: An Anthology Of Contemporary Philippine Poetry, edited by Khavn De La Cruz and Joel M. Toledo. This will be on September 2, Friday, 6 p.m., at the Ayala Museum, Makati Avenue corner De La Rosa Street, Makati City.

Under the Storm is a compilation of 150 poems from an eclectic mix of 150 Filipino poets: from the renowned and the known to the upcoming and the knowable. It surveys the landscape, explores the topography of the phenomenal, social, and lingual developments in contemporary Philippine Poetry. This is not simply a gathering of the intelligent. It is a harvesting of works by the willing and the devoted to the labor of crafting, the human turn, and the myriad possibilities of language.

Poetry performances by various personalities and literary figures

Live music from

Free Admission

Book Design by Piya Constantino
Cover Art by W Don Flores

We are now accepting pre-orders, at the special price of P450. Regular price is P800; launch price is P600. You may pre-order additional copies via email addressed to literature@movfest.org. Pre-ordered books should be paid for by August 27 via:

  • Cash: you can leave your payment at Bookay-ukay Bookstore (55 Maginhawa Street, UP Teachers Village) or Sputnik Comics (Cubao Expo, General Romulo Street, Araneta Center, Cubao)
  • G-Cash: details to be given upon request; note that there is a P10 Gcash fee for payments below P1,000; 1% for payments above P1,000
  • Paypal: details to be given upon request

    4th .MOV International Film, Music, & Literature Festival
    September 1 to 6, 2011
    The Podium, Ayala Museum, Greenbelt 3 Park, & UP Film Center