Getting real

What is reality? That which is experienced by the eyes or what's felt by the heart? 

I see many people, from our house full of disappointing family members (who are blissfully ignorant) to the streets, to the train with busy, frantic commuters, all have problems of their own, up to the workplace where people dress up their reality with flashy outfits, colorful curses & shapeless smoking. 

I see all forms and molds, hear sob stories and some fantastic make believe  bragging. I watch like a moviegoer with a screen unfolding. I see, but I don't feel. It's strange or should i say am estranged?

If I were to put myself in the scene, I'll be my usual problematic self.  Atlas, with a world of concern on my shoulder. Is this for real? How can one person have all the problems of the world or feel the world crushing? If am just part of a scene, maybe it's bad acting or overacting. But if the emotion feels real, is it still overacting? 

Do I just size or do i seize? Do I empathize &  bleed to death or do I spectate, outside looking in?

I think i'd rather be a moviegoer than be part of the unfolding just for self preservation. The madness can consume me and I may lose it.  

Reality is arbitrary. There's old reality where we know what is right and things sort out on its own because people are inherently good. The universe will conspire of the old world. And there's the new reality of acceptance that try as we might, right we may be, we can/will still fail. And we just have to be somewhat unmaximillian about it. Appreciate the effort than the result. The value of trying and of good intention. The universe of the new reality is internal and it is us. We will try to conspire to our heart's intent.

Reality is all about perception and presentation. Reality is part make believe and part believing. I think I'll un-Atlas myself and just think of the world as it is - too big and herculean to even worry about, much more carry.