1.15.2022

eksenang ulan

It ended with a rain scene. All the episodes of Modern Love Season 1 tied nicely together by getting rained on under the same NY sky. Too nicely though in my opinion. Alam mo naman tayo, romantic pero jaded din. 

The last time I was drenched by rain, fully clothed, out in public street, was in college. My heart was broken. My boyfriend of two years (pre-g2g), cheated on me and we broke up. Walang drama. I gave back my copy of his apartment key and left. 

When the sky stormed days after though, it was like my cue to let all the tears out and have them hide with the rain. While people were rushing for cover or have their umbrellas, ako ay parang baliw na mindlessly walking in the rain, crying my heart out. There was pain. There was numbness. Mapride pa rin e. Parang I needed that cleansing ba to move on. It wasn't immediate as I would have hoped for because our org's tambayan are across each other. But these on-your-face situations and difficult experiences toughen you.

Ang ganda ng love story namin.We met sa bundok, mountain climbing. Ang intense din ng pagmamahalan. Masaya, ang daming adventures and tbh, may mga personal demons to deal with din. College time e. Ang daming pagkilala sa sarili na nagaganap. 

Years later when I commented on a common friend's post, he pm'd me in socmed. I did not feel anything at all. Totally no curiosity on what happened to him after we last spoke. I ignored his message and never looked back. 

Mukhang effective ang broken heart cleansing sa ulan.=) 



Rain