9.29.2003

a fighting chance



a fighting chance

ok, i won't deny it.
we've been fighting lately.
a fight is still a fight, no matter how babaw,
no matter how intense or violent.
both are painful, both are scathing.
pero wala naman kaming balak mang-agaw ng eksena kila kris at joey.

i don't know why, but i refuse to be my old understanding self today.
have i had enough?
i'd say, i'm not at my best mood today too.
so the hell i care.
this is my right to be angry too.
this is my moment to be unreasonable.
this is my time to throw tantrums
and this is the situation that i can't help being bitchy.

aaaaargh!

i know being this way, won't resolve the problem.
but, hey! give me some slack!

sometimes, i'd just like to give in to my emotions
and be mad as hell.

well, i am mad and bad now.
my every heartbeat is pulsating with anger,
my lips are pursed,
my eyebrows are touching already,
my earringed ears feel hot
and my used to be vast vocabulary has been limited to
tang'na, potah, pakshet, kainis, bwakanangsyet,
all with exclamation points!
so much for eloquence.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

i've been diggin somethin to read in your blog. and found this one. i love this entry...totally naka relate ako :) -w1cked

firewomyn said...

@w1cked - wow anlayo ng narating mo ha, 2003. :) hay, hope ok na kayo ng gf mo. in hindsight, instead of being angry on my own, i found out that it's better to express right away any ill feeling i have (tampo, inis level pa lang blurt it out). para hindi na lumalim pa and i won't torture myself in the process. kasi minsan, ay madalas pala (hehe), hindi naman nahuhulaan ng iba ang temperament ko. =)

Anonymous said...

i was readin your blog lately and i realized i should start from the start so here i am diggin some of your work. vey eloquent.. ganda ng pagkasulat. :) nway, away-bati kami ngayon -w1cked

firewomyn said...

@w1cked - thanks for the time to read this blog. 'appreciate it. :) ok lang ang away bati, basta laging may bati sa hulo :) watch out though, kasi nakakapagod din yan. baka lang may underlying problem that causes it. ssleep na ko ha. pagod na ang lahat sa kin, mula sa ulo, puso hanggang sa buong katawan.

Anonymous said...

i've been thinkin, why not publish your work into a book and get some mo` out of it.. i read in one of your entries that a pinoy version of a g2g book is hard to find so why not make one? you have the talent, pero sana merong mag finance ano? :) kung madame lng sana akong pera...

nhow, yep bati na kami, pero gud thing naman is sa pagbabati namen napapag-usapan namen ang mga "issues" kaya healthy pa ren. -w1cked

firewomyn said...

@w1cked - thanks for the suggestion. i appreciate it =) i'll think about it. and am happy that you and gf are just fine.