8.25.2003

coming out




i feel that i don't have anything to tell yet to my family.
it is not necessary that i volunteer the information.
but if it comes to a point that i am asked,
and there is something definite and concrete to say,
i am ready to answer.

i think i have reached the age and status wherein i don't need their approval.
it would be ideal if we will all be in agreement about important concerns,
but that's wishful thinking.

it's been merely months since i discovered a new facet of my sexuality and preference.
and i can admit that there a lot of things i haven't thought of yet,
much more decided on.

fate brought me to this.
i didn't ask nor did i seek for it
it was a gift.

of the many things i'm not sure of,
of all the things i don't know of,
there is one certainty, i know and feel.
i love myself and women without doubt.

even after all the differences, heartaches, misunderstandings.

i have considered the scenario of informing my family
and of possibly what to tell.
and what i realized is this.

i am not yet ready to tell them anything yet.
because there is nothing concrete to tell yet.
suffice to say that it's too early.
but i believe that it's a process.
and i'm willing to undergo the process until it's time.

this is my life's journey.
it has been made more meaningful when my path crossed
with peyups bisexuals, with the woman i used to care for
and with the woman i now love.

i am thankful that i've known them
and blessed to have been loved by them
and happy to be part of their social sphere.

this is me.
in and out of the closet.

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