12.27.2004

unfaithful at an ungodly hour (3:23am)

warning: this is a randomly thought entry written early in da morning. i've been letting it jel in my head for some time now. anyway, here goes...


i have just recenly understood why people become unfaithful.
when one is taking for granted the other, that is when it starts. and then the other just let the issue coagulate inside him/her.

i always think that temptations are constantly around us. what makes it real is the moment we take notice of them and identify them as such. because by then, it means they got your attention and you are interested.

i don't classify a person as a temptation if i can resist them.
it's like this, kahit sangkatutak na babae ang maghubad sa harapan mo, pero walang tumindig na kahit isang nerve ending sa erogenous zone mo, then they are no temptation at all.

but if you meet someone whom you know you like w/o much ado, that ladies and gentlemen is a certified temptation in the offing, one in the league of eve serving you with a juicy apple you so badly want to taste and eat all the way!

so how do you cook unfaithfulness?
first, you must have a spoonful of dissatisfaction, marinate overnight, then sprinkle with temptation, then let it simmer for a few minutes, and voila! infidelity is ready to be served.

infidelity is a conscious thing. i don't buy the crap often used that it just happened.
infidelity is an action and more so a decision.
from the first moment you felt the excitement w/ this tempting person, you know what you are getting yourself into.
you can actually smell infidelity brewing.

to justify the act or dilute the guilt, you just don't label and not over-analyze what's happening. so instead of confronting your partner abt your issues, you keep it to yourself & let the other use guesswork. and you choose to be comforted by a 'friend' whom you'll pour your heart and gut out and disguise the whole dynamics as friendship.

if you have the courage to be unfaithful, have also the same guts to admit it for what it really is. that it is something you chose to do, a pathway you chose to take regardless of your partner's or the relationship's inadequacies.

is infidelity a sin?
for me it is not. lying is.
infidelity is just one of the many manifestations of lying.

the issue i think is that the infidels can't admit or face their predicament as it is, and thus results to lying.
the situation is simple. may nangangaliwa kasi may nde na masaya. may nagkulang. you've lost it, ergo, all the previous arragements/agreements (you started w/ da relationship) no longer hold true for the present.

when faced w/ temptation, it's either you give in or you resist.
i think if you're truly happy w/ ur partner, there is no need to resist bec you're simply not interested.
but the moment you are resisting, that means something.
it's like a fight, you are fightin your own self. if that is the case, then you are denying yourself of what it desires, w/c in this case, is to be free of your partner to sample the temptation.

you can only be faithful to others if you are first faithful to yourself. because by then, you know yourself, what you desire, what can make you happy.

being unfaithful to others is just being faithful to yourself and what your self desires. and you can never be completely faithful to anybody other than your own self.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

AMEN!

Cherie said...

Hmmm... I haven't tried this before but I strongly believe that I'm loyal when it comes to relationships... Yeah I think I am =)

Have a great new year firewomyn! =D

Anonymous said...

I agree.. 100% ur right baby! mas masarap gawin ang bawal! Tikman ang hindi sau.... sad to say, laging ako ang naaagawan! mahirap din ang maging faithful all the time.

karlaredor said...

there are temptations around us.. but if we bit the apple.. then that's infidelity..

kapag mahina tayo.. wala.. walang mangyayari.. kakagat lang tayo..

firewomyn said...

ive never been unfaithful in my entire life.
we're all faithful up to the last temptation only ;)