8.12.2011

to others and to some

it has been an offensive week and i am tried.

two friends i value asked me this week to meet them but only for an hour because they're meeting their other friends after. one friend asked me out also, but didn't bother to show up. and then i think i got asked for a threesome with a hetero couple. but that's an altogether different story.

every time a friend asks me out, i get excited. an opportunity to go out, unwind, socialize and touch base with people i care about. but to be squeezed in to fill a gap in their schedule like an after thought of some sort, or worse to be stood up is at first offensive and secondly sad.

am offended to be considered with such little thought and care. to be belittled to an hour's worth. but at the very bottom, it made me sad. to feel and realize that am devalued as such when i would extend my arm and leg to help them. no, this is not about "sumbat". i just thought simply that i matter to them. yes, i want to feel important. to be treated and made to feel important.

the reality check is, you give importance variable to the degree of friendship. and so, not all friends are treated equally. specially now when social network has heavily diluted the meaning of friendship to as simple as an accept friend request.

to them, i may be their last-minute-one-hour-can-dismiss friend. to some, i am the inspiration of their daily creative greetings, someone they're proud to know, one who profoundly touched their lives, a friend who makes them feel better.

i am firewomyn. i bared my heart and shared my life here to whoever cares and takes time to read. and i thank all the "somes", the anonymous readers, and more for making me feel important. =)


My tea's gone cold, I'm wondering why
I got out of bed at all
The morning rain clouds up my window
and I can't see at all
And even if I could it'd all be grey,
but your picture on my wall
It reminds me that it's not so bad,
it's not so bad

I drank too much last night, got bills to pay,
my head just feels in pain
I missed the bus and there'll be hell today,
I'm late for work again
And even if I'm there, they'll all imply
that I might not last the day
And then you call me and it's not so bad,
it's not so bad and

I want to thank you
for giving me the best day of my life
Oh just to be with you
is having the best day of my life

Push the door, I'm home at last
and I'm soaking through and through
Then you hand me a towel
and all I see is you
And even if my house falls down,
I wouldn't have a clue
Because you're near me

And I want to thank you
for giving me the best day of my life
Oh just to be with you
is having the best day of my life



15 comments:

Anonymous said...

im proud to be one of the anons. you do touch me in different ways fire! continue inspiring us. thank you for making this blog.


-clyte

Anonymous said...

*hugs
sino ba mga yan at mabatukan nga. ang bad ha. Ibitin sa mangga namin!
G

Anonymous said...

hi fire! let's catch up next time, but not in a 3some way hehe! loosen up a bit.. an hour with you spent on a busy day isn't offensive at all. i think, you should be flattered, they still wanna see you even if they had a hectic day. whatchathink?? except for the one who stood you up tho.. -w1cked

Anonymous said...

fire, hindi naman ako yung isang ibibitin sa mangga di ba? awww.. :(

Anonymous said...

@anonymous without a name:
guilty ka? tsk. tsk.
G

Anonymous said...

@G, oh, btw.. that anonymous one is my post.. i just forgot to type -w1cked on that one. *winks* :)

Anonymous said...

@wicked:

oh, guilty ka o hindi?
G

scout said...

Parang yung sabi mo sa kin dati, may order of priorities. Ganun talaga (pero ouch pa rin). *bato-bato sa langit*

Anonymous said...

G, i'm not guilty.. talk to my lawyer. hehe! my state witness is firewomyn. :p -w1cked

Anonymous said...

si fire gawin pang state witness? mga kasamahan mo ba ang mga yun? pagsabihan mo nga.
-G

firewomyn said...

@clyte - thank you clyte, really :) and your comment inspired me too :)

@G - ansaya naman at may sarili akong sosyal na bouncer. hehe. let's make lots of love not war. pahingi na lang ng hinog na mangga! :)

@w1cked - you know you're right, but of course, the longer time, the better, quality time ba. hehe. between the two of us, we're good :) *hugs*

@scout - at syempre limot ko na yung sinabi ko na yan. haha. ouch gone. yey! :)

Anonymous said...

hinog lang? kahit bulaklak ng mangga! :)) -G

firewomyn said...

@G - kinakain ba ang bulaklak ng mangga? hehe

Anonymous said...

this the one. Natawa na lang ako. :)-G

Anonymous said...

now I know who w1cked is. :) Ill see you soon-
G